We are quickly moving toward the end of the year. Your work-related performance will be evaluated and discussed by your manager, your manager’s peers, and your manager’s boss.

While some employers have implemented continuous feedback processes, many others continue to use the performance evaluation approach that has been in place for decades.

Let’s shift to your personal life.

You are probably starting to think about and prepare for the holidays that occur during November and December. Your celebrated holidays may be different than mine, because there are different cultural and religious traditions around the world.

· You have expectations from your family and friends.

· You have expectations at work from your colleagues and manager.

· You may be looking forward to this time of year OR you may be dreading it.

I’m going to suggest that you consider reframing how you think about this time of year.

Slow down.

Evaluate the people in your life. Then promote, demote, or fire. You are the CEO of your life. (Avoid or eliminate the energy vampires and toxic gremlins!)

Evaluate the activities you are invited to participate in. If it’s not a “hell yes,” it is okay to say “no.”

When you hear yourself saying, “I should _____.” Stop and ask if a different decision would better meet your needs.

You are the CEO. You get to choose how to spend your precious time and energy.

Don’t minimize your needs to please others. Your needs are as important as anyone else’s needs. Always.

What inspired this post? I’m getting lots of invitations to attend events and parties. I am also tired. So very tired and I have many commitments. I’m saying no to a lot of things. And I’m assessing who and what gives me energy or takes it.

May all of us who self-identify as recovering people pleasers learn to let go and choose ourselves.

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