Most of us will say "good" and then move on in the conversation to something else.

But I'm willing to bet, you aren't "good" or even "okay."

Many years ago, I had a co-worker ask me in the hallway at work, "How are you?" When I answered honestly with, "Well, my daughter was up all night because she is teething, and my husband is back in the hospital..." the co-worker interrupted me and said "Just say okay. I don't really care to know the truth. No one does." I was shocked. I was embarassed. And I swallowed the truth and said "okay."

I stopped interacting with that co-worker except when I absolutely had to.

She was a leader in the HR community or at least based on her job title she was supposed to be a leader. She wasn't.

I never forgot that interaction.

When you ask someone, "how are you" stop and listen. Really listen. Ask follow up questions.

Connection. Consideration. Compassion.

They are universal needs that sustain us as human beings.

For many of us, these needs are unmet.

You build healthy company cultures and relationships in the smallest of moments when asking and answering "How are you?"

Pause. Listen.

And if they say "good." Stop and say. "No, I mean it. How are you?"

They will be shocked. And they may cry. It's so rare to have someone mean it when they ask that question.

#leadership #howareyou #relationships